I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
A+ Viking dick
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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