We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
