Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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