we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
His nipple licking is glorious
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