you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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