I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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