And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
