I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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