? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
