My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
