Don't you send me to vm
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
