And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
There's always time for handjobs
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You dont lie about slip and slides
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
