he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
