Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
We need to get me chipped asap
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
