Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
