would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
