Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
