just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
