I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
