i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
