ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
