i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
It was like getting head from an anaconda
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
