My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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