Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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