YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
