I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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