This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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