Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
