shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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