:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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