too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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