Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
