it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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