You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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