we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
there is puke in my bra ... again
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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