Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Randomize
