i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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