i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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