Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Randomize
