I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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