Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
