ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize