Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
