I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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