Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
