you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
