I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
