you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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