who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Randomize
