the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
